They appraised my house as a one bathroom even after I showed them the second bathroom behind the bush in the back yard.
I'm an author and artist who just can't get enough of the zombie apocalypse. If you love zombies, this blog is for you. I also write jokes. You may notice one or two of them on the blog.
Sunday, July 31, 2016
Saturday, July 30, 2016
Ward's Words #850
I thought my new job as a lab monitor was going to be impressive. That's until I found out it was at a dog park.
Monday, July 25, 2016
Ward's Words #848
I think baseball needs a fast forward button. Does everybody need a 3 minute crotch adjustment time.
Sunday, July 24, 2016
Ward's Words #846
Universal Pictures rejected my movie idea. They said 3 shade of Ward was a bit pedestrian.
Friday, July 22, 2016
Ward's Words #844
You know you're friends are all old people when most of their email contacts end in .aol
Wednesday, July 20, 2016
Ward's Words #842
I changed my car icon on the GPS to the race car. I may not be living so large but my digital self is rocking it big time.
Tuesday, July 19, 2016
Ward's Words #839
When buying a home, I like to research how close my new home is going to be to a nuclear power plant. I'd rather be close enough to be in the kill zone than that zone where you become some kind of weird mutant.
Sunday, July 17, 2016
Ward's Words #838
How does Superman cut his hair. Someone once suggested that he uses his heat vision but if that’s true, how does he do the back?
Friday, July 15, 2016
Monday, July 11, 2016
Ward's Words #834
Why do we continue to let archeologists do their job. They constantly are unearthing some ancient evil. Unleashing some gargoyle or mummy on an unsuspecting populace. And when they aren't releasing some monstrous plague what did they do? They reveal ancient history. What have we ever learned from history?
Thursday, July 7, 2016
Ward's Words #831
April and I went hiking, but while still in the car, we ate all the trail mix and because it was really salty we drank all the water. Now, we’re overheated, tired, thirsty, and have to pee. Where’d we park the car?
Wednesday, July 6, 2016
Ward's Words #829
While reading the USA Today sports page I read an article on how Joey Chestnut regained the hotdog eating crown. Since when has eating become a sport? I’m starting a vigorous training regimen right now.
Monday, July 4, 2016
Ward's Words #827
If tryptophan makes people groggy, do zombies get sleepy after a Thanksgiving Day feast too?
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